If you haven’t read my first post about my pornography addiction I suggest you read it to understand this post. These are practical steps I took to overcome struggling with pornography:
- I prayed about it. Yes it’s that simple, sometimes you just need to be honest with yourself and God and tell him what you are struggling with.
- Be transparent with God. For a very long time I couldn’t bring myself to say “I was addicted to pornography” . It’s like being in a relationship and not telling your partner how you are feeling. This is what I was doing with God. I proclaimed to have a relationship with him but I wasn’t telling him how I felt and what I was struggling with. Sometimes you actually just need to say it ,more for yourself than God.
- Tell someone you trust about it. This is a bit ironic because I didn’t do this until I felt like I was free from pornography. But I strongly believe if I had told someone earlier ,I wouldn’t have had to struggle with it by myself for such a long time. So find someone whether it’s a close friend, parent, mentor or spiritual leader that you know will be able to help you, pray with you and hold you accountable.
- Forgive yourself. I felt dirty for quite a while. I made guilt and shame stop me from praying and reading the word.I felt like how can I even talk to God when my mind is just so full of dirt. But what you need to understand is that the almighty God has forgiven you already. So believe it with all your heart, accept it and move on. You are precious in the sight of the Lord despite what you have done. Trust me !
- Identify what makes you watch pornography. Once you realise what it is, your prayers can be more specific and you can start to be more intentional . For me it was every time I felt sad or rejected by someone I would run to it. I like to analyse things. So I analysed who I was talking to or what I was thinking about prior to me watching pornography. I realised there were specific individuals I needed to stop talking to and specific things I needed to stop thinking about in order to prevent me feeling sad or rejected. As my mother says prevention is better than cure.
- Get a journal. Recently this has been helping me a lot. I just write down what I am feeling. I remember a few months ago I literally wrote this down: ‘God, something is telling me to watch pornography. I am struggling right now but give me the strength not to watch it’. Honest to God for a good hour or two or maybe three, I was shaking, as if I was addicted to some sort of drug (this is when I realised this was more than a struggle it was a spiritual battle). But I decided I wasn’t going to give in. So I just kept on saying “Lord give me strength , Lord give me strength” as I paced up and down my room . To God be the glory, after that experience I haven’t really been tempted to watch pornography ever since.
I will be honest with you this process of deliverance is going to take time. The images still haunt me on a daily basis. But with God all things are possible. Just keep on praying about it and if you can fast, do so. I am not an expert in this field. These are just the main things that helped me . There are many books, videos and posts about pornography addiction. Search it up and you will realise you are not the only one struggling with it. But most importantly remember God is with you and loves you no matter what.
My hiding place, My safe refuge
My treasure Lord you are
My friend and king
Anointed one, Most holyBecause you’re with me …I will not fear ♫