GCSE was a mission. Moving to London and starting a new life and school was hard for me. I started school late. I found GCSE’s hard. I did not come out with 5 A*-C. I didn’t pass my English , Science and barely Maths. So when applying to college I had to do 3 years and that messed me up emotionally and mentally.
I started seeing myself as a failure and disappointment. In my head I thought my friends were making fun of me , thinking I was a failure and not smart so I started isolating myself from them because I didn’t feel like I was on their level of smartness. There was a moment were I was sitting next to some of my friends during break time and they were talking about their exam and their subjects etc and I didn’t get what they were talking about so I was like “what.. I don’t understand ” and one of my friend said ” oh don’t worry Hun your doing BTEC so you won’t understand ” and I was like rahhh . So in my head I was like is that how they really feel about me . So I stop sitting around the table with them and just ended up saying hi to them when I see them walking by in the corridors.
I resit my English GCSE twice. The first time I was one mark away from a C , then the second time it was 2 marks away. I started getting frustrated and I gave up at one point because I started questioning God saying ‘why’. I thought I had no hope , I stopped praying and fasting. Living in an African household just made the situation worst. Everyday I received daily lectures and my parents asking me silly questions like do I actually like failing…like it’s my portion cause it’s NOT.
One day my grandma called my from Nigeria and prayed for me and she made me realise that I can’t give up because I have so many ambitions in life , so many goals I want to accomplish and so many children I want to help. So I started praying and asking God for forgiveness and not believing in him. Time passed and I became more confident because I knew God has my back and I knew I’ve been working my butt off. On the day of my exam I was ready and claimed my pass. As I was doing my exam I was praying I probably prayed more in that exam than I have ever did in my life time (LOL)
Finally glory be to God I passed my English !!!! Yes it was few years later than the rest but I passed it . The moral of the story is do not give up and keep on pushing. Have faith in God and believe he will do it. Yes your friends might be doing better than you but just remember that your time is coming . He is planning your success and greatness. One thing I learnt is that I should never question God and believe that he will do it.
Remember that your time is coming…
God be with you during your exam season !!!
Stay blessed, Anonymous